The Near Side: 18 Ways to Say You Fell Off Your Horse

Why tell people you fell of your horse when there are so many great euphemisms that make eating dirt seem much more fun?

Leslie Potter

March 19, 2015

26998

If you tell someone you fell off a horse, it sounds like something potentially tragic happened. But if you instead say that you ate dirt, it sounds sort of fun and lighthearted. Maybe that’s why there are so many euphemisms for falling off a horse. It’s just more pleasant to discuss an unpleasant event when you can use a creative expression to identify it.

Our Facebook friends contributed their favorite examples, and I’ve picked a few of their creative suggestions to highlight here. So next time the unthinkable happens, don’t say, “I fell off.” Instead, say…

1. I bought real estate
2. My horse and I went our separate ways
3. I performed a random gravity check

1. I had a free bone density check
2. I had a flying lesson
3. I flew Air Equestrian

1. I had an unscheduled footing inspection
2. I visited Dirt City
3. I had an assisted dismount

I had a dirt facial
I became a lawn dart

1. I used the emergency exits on Air Pony
2. I performed an equine-assisted aerial maneuver
3. I exited out the side door

1. I had an unscheduled dismount
2. I bid farewell to fine leather
3. I’m in a transitional relationship with my saddle

I'm in a transitional relationship with my saddle

And finally, sing it with me…

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“I fought the lawn and the lawn won.”

Thanks to our Facebook friends for their creative contributions. Check out the full list here. Have another one to add? Leave it in the comments.

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12 COMMENTS

Mark March 20, 2015 at 5:54 am
I see riders fall off on the right side
Of the horse. Why do I fall off on the
Left? I jump. Is it the length of my
stirrups?
Jaimie March 20, 2015 at 8:16 am
My favorite to say is that I had some “unplanned flying lessons” and usually end up laughing about it. Sometimes I’ll make a reference to the musical Wicked and say that “I was trying to defy gravity, but the gravity won”.
Muriel March 20, 2015 at 9:38 am
When you ‘achieve’ your fall of the year, you qualify for ‘the Autumn Club’ and get a red maple leaf lapel pin (a tiny one!).
Brandi March 20, 2015 at 4:52 pm
I’ve used “creative new dismount maneuvers”.
BB March 21, 2015 at 7:29 am
These are hilarious! Thanks, Leslie.
K March 22, 2015 at 7:55 pm
Haha these are awesome! I always use the “random gravity check” or “the ground was calling”.
Rhoda March 24, 2015 at 4:39 pm
An old cowboy/rancher once told me that he didn’t get thrown. He just got off with qa lot of help
Ellen March 24, 2015 at 5:06 pm
I made a sand angel!
Galadriel March 24, 2015 at 11:55 pm
Fun
Nicole April 14, 2016 at 9:00 am
My riding instuctor always laughs ands says “oh look Nicole the ground wanted you to kiss it” lols
Rose Ann April 15, 2016 at 6:31 am
A friend fell off my horse but she said “she jumped”
Erin A March 29, 2019 at 3:21 am
My horse and I parted ways…