Unless you’ve been living under a muck bucket you know that it’s tough in this economy to sell a horse. Competition to attract a buyer is fierce, and some of the advertising tactics seem to reflect that desperation. At least that’s how I feel after rummaging around on Craigslist, which never seems to disappoint me with its minefield of peculiar horse ads.
First let’s start with “Horses as Bedroom Furniture.” Apparently the ability to lie upon a horse’s back without it catapulting you into the next county is a major selling point. And I’m not sure why this is so because, quite frankly, I intend to remain sitting upright when I’m aboard a horse.
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Am I to surmise that this horse is so reliable that this guy can not only lie upon its back but he can also perform pull-ups from the metal cross beam looming inches above his head? Or maybe he’s about to do a whoop-tee-do dismount off the horse’s tail end. Either way, I get a creepy feeling this photo will someday be followed by the comment, “Poor Uncle Roger was never the same after that skull fracture.”
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Since this photo was taken in the evening, I’m guessing it means that this horse not only allows people to lie on his back, but they can sleep on his back, too. This trait comes in handy for those unexpected overnight visitors. Just send them out to the barn where they can hunker down on top of Petey.
Adults that volunteer for ad duty are one thing. But I’m more than a little bothered when tiny kids get plunked onto the back of a horse like a lug sack of carrots. Take a look at two ads with baby riders.
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Successful sale ads promote the skills and talents of the horse. What does this photo say about this horse? Could it possibly hold the World Show title in Baby Cowboy Team Roping?
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Not to be outdone, this seller takes the Baby Rider idea even further. I’m not sure which bothers me more: the diaper, the bare toes or the fact that it’s A BABY SITTING ON THE BACK OF AN 800-POUND ANIMAL. Good grief. If this trend continues we’ll soon see ads where the seller is holding an embryonic ultrasound image above the horse’s back.
After viewing these ad photos, it’s understandable why some people can’t sell their horse. Sure the market’s bad, but if the ads were composed better, the horse might have a better chance at finding a new home. Don’t you agree?
Back to Life with Horses
haHa, too right! Some of my personal favorites are the ads for green broke horses with the caption”Kid Safe” and a kid sitting on said 1000 pound green broke horse.
Thanks for featuring these ads. You just don’t see many good horses on craigslist. Most of them are the back yard types- the only skills they have are they are broke and can walk down a trail. And it’s even more amazing the prices they charge. You mean you want $6,000 for a grade trail horse?? Dream on.
Sometimes all you want is a nice quiet trail horse. Not everyone wants to compete. But this was a fun article to read, anyway. Pshh, bedroom furniture…hahahahaha!!
This is some of the funniest writing I’ve ever read in a blog.
Putting babies on horse back is not funny, but the way you wrote about it is hilarious.
And the people laying on their horses just crack me up!
I don’t put much stock in photos. You can get a horse to do anything for the split second it takes to snap a photo.
Great post!
:^) hysterical
Oh yes. The baby/tot pictures are very sad, especially when there are no adults even holding the child, the kid isn’t wearing a helmet (or is too young to wear one), and no-one is even holding the horse on a lead. Yeah, I’m really going to trust a horse from someone as incompetent as that.
Also, the ‘horses as springboard’ ads and the ‘horses as limo’ ads. These are two photos that I found on Dreamhorse: http://img143.imageshack.us/img143/8419/handspringoffrump.jpg
http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/8450/fourastride.jpg
“Bedroom furniture horse” is great for trail riding-you don’t need a sleeping bag!
You know what the man on the black horse is doing? I’m pretty sure he’s planking!
what is planking?
THANKS FOR YOUR COMMENTS!
I’VE BEEN INFORMED BY SOMEONE MUCH YOUNGER AND MUCH MORE IN-TUNE WITH SOCIAL TRENDS THAN ME THAT “PLANKING” IS WHERE YOU FLATTEN YOURSELF OUT AND LIE DOWN ON SOMETHING UNUSUAL. THEN YOU TAKE A PHOTO OF IT WITH YOUR PHONE AND SEND IT TO ALL YOUR PALS. I GUESS LYING FLAT OUT ON A HORSE WOULD COUNT AS A SUITABLE PLANKING CHALLENGE. WHY SOMEONE WOULD WANT TO DO THAT I DO NOT KNOW. USUALLY WHEN I LIE DOWN ON SOMETHING I DOZE OFF.
I agree, that little baby looks cute sitting in the saddle with his cowboy hat until the horse spooks and little baby goes flying into the air. A friend of mine keeps bugging me to give her 2 year old a ride. “She can sit in your lap,” she insists. Seeing, as I’ve only been riding for a few years (and even if I had been riding all my life) this seems like a really bad idea. “But it will be so cute,” she insists. Sure, real cute until something goes wrong and I’m left trying to calm/stop a horse while holding a baby. Good plan. Nothing bad can happen there. *sigh*