Horse Illustrated Magazine

Right now, my inbox, mailbox and even my facebook news feed are all filled with holiday gift ideas for equestrians. Usually they come with some enticing 10% off or free shipping offer or something like that. It’s all very tempting, of course, but there’s one problem. I have no equestrians on my holiday shopping list. I’m just not sure that my non-horsey parents and siblings would be excited to receive a pair of winter riding breeches or a colorful saddle pad.

Of course, I’m sure that the marketing departments of the world are well aware that people can be tempted to do a bit of shopping for themselves during this season. And they’re right. In the interest of staying out of debt, I’ve been deleting email announcements about special offers at my favorite online tack shops and tossing catalogs into the recycle bin without flipping through them. But sometimes some sale or product piques my interest just enough to let my guard down, and next thing I know, I’m virtually window shopping at every horse website I can find.

I’m keeping the credit card tucked away safely, but I’ve come across some items in my shameful browsing that I can resist buying, but I still need to share.

Remember your old Converse All-Stars? You won’t see them on the basketball court anymore, but they never really went out of style. Now you can sport your Chucks with equestrian flair, courtesy of the USEF. Supposedly these were created for the U.S. riders at the World Equestrian Games this year, and who doesn’t want to dress like the world’s best? The USEF logo is recognizable to your barn buddies, but abstract enough that your hipster friends won’t realize you’re flogging a brand when you wear them to your next indie rock show. Maybe. Are they worth $80? I don’t know, but apparently plenty of people think they are, because they’re out-of-stock. No mention of whether or not they’ll be restocked.

Keeping with the footwear theme, you have probably heard of Tom’s Shoes. They’re a company best known for donating a pair of shoes to children in impoverished areas for each pair purchased. They have what they call the “wrap boot,” and yes, it is actually inspired by the humble polo wraps that are probably sitting in your tack room right now. I’m not going to lie. I want to want these boots, but I’m probably too self-conscious to pull off that look. The user-submitted photos on Tom’s website mostly show women wearing these boots wrapped over their skinny jeans, and—showing my age, here—I will probably never own a pair of skinny jeans.

But why should the human get to have all the fashion fun? Your horse deserves to dress up, too, which is why you need Pony Bling. These are little hair bands with decorative crystals that you add to your horse’s braids. Full disclosure: the reason these are not on my wish list is because I already own three sets. Look, don’t judge. I never had a pony as a kid, so now I’m making up for lost time.

I don’t think you need to be a horse person to appreciate a light-up, cowboy boot beer mug. You just need to be someone with a sense of humor, or maybe someone who throws rodeo-themed parties. It works just as well for root beer, by the way. Make sure you also get a set of light up, horse head margarita glasses for your Cinco de Mayo party, too. Classy stuff.

Clearly, there is something for everyone out there. If you stumble across any unique, horsey items in your last-minute shopping, please tell us about them by clicking “Submit a Comment” below.

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